July | 2015 | LET'S BE TRUTHFUL

When you have no one to stand up for you or to help you fight your battles, who does one look to for support and reassurance during those periods of peril, turmoil and misdirected aggression that greets you at every turn? When you yearn for a quiet and peaceful place of solitude away from all of the conflict, who is there to teach you how to embrace the adversity and to press on and press through? What does one do when one is at the complete mercy of whomever is governing ones life and possesses an unmitigated control over every miniscule aspect of that life? What are the thoughts that flow through ones mind and what are the options? Invisible…

One would more than likely be encapsulated with an enormous amount of self-doubt, internal conflict, a defeatist mentality and lack of self-identity that would lend itself to an extreme disconnect from reality. Ones vision and reasoning becomes completely obscured and decisions now become irresponsible and reckless. There would undoubtedly be an overwhelming feeling of exasperation and hopelessness that would ultimately envelop the soul and hold captive the spirit of dreams. All that one is surrounded with are indicators of failure, confinement and restrictions with nothing that offers up possibilities for potential opportunities of change. Inside of you there stirs a constant desire and need for something more palatable than this seemingly meaningless existence and shell of a life but the doors of welcomed passage appear to be sealed indefinitely. This was a mindset and seemingly inescapable reality for me during a time in my life and currently appears to be the reality and aimless journey for a multitude of others in today’s society. Invisible…

One should take just a moment to ponder the hopelessness that one would feel if one were to be subjected to a life of obscurity, where our presence was meaningless. A life that presently reflects no semblance of promise and for all practical purposes is illustrative of defeat and void of meaning. How would one feel knowing that there was something more tangible in life for others but for you an elusive and ostensibly unattainable reality? Invisible….

As a nation of so many diverse ethnic groups we all at one time or another throughout the course of history til present day have experienced some form of discrimination or prejudice. We are extremely familiar with injustice and subjective bias. We offer no empathy or compassion towards our fellow being and are much to consumed with selfishness. We continue to treat each other with dis-respect, dis-courteousness and vitriol infused with a virulent antagonistic behavior. We reluctantly if ever take time to acknowledge the truth and the harshness of its reality unless of course it benefits our own agendas.

I can’t even begin to imagine what a life of absolute subjugation would feel like but I do have an idea of what imprisonment feels like. There are some similarities since both are forms of incarceration but not quite the same as living in the free world and watching that freedom and liberty being enjoyed by others on a daily basis. In prison there are walls that lock you in, guards and other forms of security to insure that there is no escape. In this world that we live in we often times become completely exasperated and full of self doubt because of walls that lock us in.. Walls erected of systemic oppression and discrimination and walls that some of us unknowingly create…Invisible

Granted, there are many obstacles in life that one must overcome but it is not as though the opportunities are not there. Exactly what is it that stands in the way and prevents a person from making progress in today’s free world? Could it be fear, lack of confidence or a lack of desire and a clear-cut method by which to achieve something of significance? This is the question that I struggle with constantly every single day to find an answer too.

Have we become imprisoned by our own doings or non-doings? We must honestly ask ourselves where does the real and absolute responsibility lay? Who and what are the roots of our problems and issues that somehow never seem to warrant our immediate attention or solutions for correction. Is it through eyes of fear that we gaze upon the improprieties of mankind and take no action? Why are we not able to separate ourselves from that segment of Black and white America that is rife with negativity, low standards and principles and declare our independence of it? Would not a pride of lions expel from their community that one culprit or culprits that reaps havoc, discourse and disruption for the sake of pride. Are we that afraid to take action for fear of being labeled a sellout or tom or even a snitch? Something is inherently wrong with this type of mindset…. Invisible…

Could it be that because there is a lack of real suffrage today people are without a driving force? Is it because we have allowed ourselves to lower our standards and expectations which in retrospect and coincidentally have compromised our morals and principles? It appears that this has in effect all but diminished our pursuit of excellence and the desire for outstanding accomplishments.. So with all that said, where does the answer lie?

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It is my belief that the answer lies within all of us. We as individuals and hopefully collectively can accomplish great things. First and foremost there has to be a raw evaluation of self. A truthful and honest look into what one as an individual must improve on or change in order to effectively make a difference not just in their life but in the lives of others whom they impact..

I may not possess much in the way of fortune but I can offer you an ear, a shoulder and a kind word. I can show you a smile and look at you with eyes of hope and share with you a heart full of compassion and empathy. I’m unable to erase your pain completely but I can help to make the moment lighter. I can share with you my struggles in life and offer you comfort in letting you know that the fight is not only yours. In this regard, just maybe we can forge a bond with a commitment of hope and determination in an effort to make a difference. We can pave the way and lay down the path with bricks to success….You are not invisible to me…

If this is accomplished we will move away from the realm of invisibility into the realm of visibility…

Written By Al DeVeaux Jr.

It is said and written in scripture that the meek shall inherit the earth. I say that the earth will open her belly and swallow them up, She will only relinquish her bounty to those who will work hard, earnest and diligently to extract the promise she cradles within.. Still she does not guarantee to yield to all who come beckoning for her riches. The prospectors who come just as so many before them shall be cast by the wayside and never come to know her promise. The earth just as life owes no loyalty or favor to anyone. It is also written and said, We Reap What We Sow….

However, some of us do find favor…

I venerate with the utmost humility and gratitude those entities who are the conveyors of life, the purveyors of sustenance, the creators of humankind who transcend the confines of this physical realm and exceed the spiritual comprehension of man. I ask that they lay out the path before me and guide my steps along the way for I am prone to deviate from the course of moral righteousness, dignity, spiritual enlightenment and truth. My understanding and knowledge of this world has been limited to the written word of man and I have been misled by the teachings of those whose motives are self-serving and intentions are to instill illusions of dominance and superiority in those whom they seek to deceive and oppress.

I have with frequent fervor consumed the nectar of intoxicating elixirs. I have dabbled in various substances that delivered euphoric bliss which also held me captive with addiction both physically and mentally to their momentarily deliverance of well-being and escapism from my world of pain and disappointment. I have been beckoned and seduced by the sweet erotic poison of voluptuous, vivacious and sexually stimulating women of dark alleys and dimly lit passageways. I have coveted and partaken of their sensuousness and have felt the sting of their callousness and indifference. I acknowledge that I have lived a promiscuous life and that I have been a sexually charged and somewhat perverted human being who has for decades past lent himself to a life strewn with what some may consider to be highly immoral conduct and unforgivable transgressions.I am yet only human and I am man..

My journey has been one of decadence, resistance, rebellion, non conformity, irresponsibility, irreparable dismissal and total disregard for my physical, mental and spiritual well-being. I’ve rejected all concepts of religion, mans ideologies, structured establishments whose imbedded institutions and laws favored not my ascension to unparalleled heights of success but served to define my existence irrelevant.. My way has resembled that of scattered leaves fallen from Autumn trees or that of wind-blown sand on arid and dusty desert land. I have wandered through groves thick with illusions of grandiose splendor and fantasy. I have grown weary from exhaustive search of relevance and purpose. The sharpness of reality slices through my conscience and I have contemplated self-destruction for deliverance.

But mine is not mine to take as it is mine to make. The road is always longer when eyes are opaque and navigation requires direction. Ones ship need be righted, ones compass point need be sighted. The waves may rise full and high but temperament and fortitude need not subside.
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I look through the spectrum of heavens above and beyond for solace and peace of mind, body, soul and spirit. I have sought restoration from condemnation with earnest revelation of truth and knowledge to construct formation of foundation. Understanding comes through life’s experiences entwined with the deepest of want and desire. I have yearned incessantly for my moment of reconciliation. For I am in need of clarity and salvation.. The severity of shame knows no boundaries. Lamentation yields forgiveness for a heart of genuineness.

The promise of goodness. The promise of duty. The promise of worth. The promise is knowing and understanding that the greater the effort the greater the potential for yield. The promised land is the life we live. The promised land is the life we build. I have been given favor yet I fear that I will not live up to my promise. However, I promise that I will put forth a great effort and that I will work diligently at my purpose with goodness of heart.

This is my promised land…

Written by Al DeVeaux Jr. Africafith